The stage of the Palace Hotel, Manchester was recently graced by the presence of that sing-ular song thrush, Miss Tallulah Bulkhead.

Until plucked from obscurity by Mr Big, her tale was one of toil and perseverance in the face of adversity. Hailing from Brooklyn, NY., she started singing at a young age in Mr Big's joint on the Lower East-side, mainly to distract from her terrible dancing.

Says Tallulah of her mentor "Mr Big says I got a lot a potential for someone who don't dance so good and goin' deaf with two left feet. He sent me to the best music teacher in town who sadly committed harry carry after only my 66th lesson. But he did teach me some great numbers such as Puttin On The Ritz; I Get A Kick Out Of You and of course My Name Is Tallulah. If you're lucky and you don't have no beef with Tony I might sing at your joint sometime."

Entertaining Mr Big & audience

Mr Big & protege Tallulah

Mr Big Inc. has asked us to stress that Tallulah is available  to perform at the speak-easy of your choice. "She'll bring the house down" he said rather ominously.

Due to an ongoing investigation into his financial activity by the IRS, all enquiries should be made via the offices of Mischief La-Bas.

Mischief's latest superstars, Norville & Beane, at the launch

Glasgow's finest and most artistic Figure Skating Duo, Senga Norville and Sandy Beane, are now in training for their bid to represent Scotland at the Commonwealth Games 2014.

THE ARTISTES
Norville and Beane have been skating together since they first met at East Kilbride Junior School in 1978, and for the past three years have been polishing their ability to at least stay upright at the East Kilbride Ice Rink situated in the fabulous Olympia Shopping Centre. The very word 'Olympia' has ingrained itself in their psyche, and has now inspired them to 'go for gold'. Currently, Senga and Sandy both work in the 'Mastics and Sealants' department of Parkhead B&Q, but as Norville and Beane they now stake their claim to represent Scotland at the Commonwealth Games 2014, to be held in Glasgow. They feel that local support, sheer hard work, and stunning lycra, will enable them to triumph on home turf.

A touching moment on ice

Wasting no time and no opportunity, Norville and Beane have employed a full support team to help them in their bid. With a loan from Cash Converters and sponsorship from 'Drumchapel World of Lycra' they have secured the services of: Manager Larisa Bogdanski, a world famous Russian Skater who unfortunately broke her leg while kicking her ex-partner after he spectacularly dropped her during the opening sequence of their live television debut; Chorographer Herbert Fawcette, who has devised startling routines for many major productions including 'Kramer vs Kramer on Ice', 'Skates Alive!' and the hip-hop extravaganza 'Vanilla Ice'; Trainer Archie Beane (Sandy's uncle), who has given backbone support to the couple since the early days and whose 'old school' attitudes to physical fitness and training come from his experience in the world of boxing.